The 100th Problem
If you know me well, you would know that I love 9GAG and
memes. Within a few minutes of scrolling through the website, I am up to date
with current events, impending world wars, viral outbreaks, latest trends and
celebrity gossip. Hell, I already know what the weather is like outside without
looking out the window. Chances are, someone has already made a post about it.
With that said, I consider 9GAG and any other similar site as a social
thermometer. 9GAG gives me an idea of how society views and perceives issues. I
see it as a social study that helps me see where society stands on certain
topics that are not otherwise discussed at length. One such topic is male
abuse.
Remember when TMZ leaked video footage of Jay-Z being beat
down by his sister-in-law, Solange Knowles, after the Met Gala? I don’t know
about you, but that footage was jaw-dropping scary. I wasn’t aware of the
incident until these started popping up on my 9GAG…
Yes, they were funny. I would be lying if I said I
didn’t laugh. But seriously though, male abuse is no laughing matter. Let me be clear here. Abuse is abuse,
whether it is done by a man or woman. But, it seems to me that male abuse is
one of society’s best kept secrets.
According to a national survey conducted in 2013,
roughly 25% of male Canadians suffer from some type of domestic abuse. I,
however, suspect that this statistic is much higher. Most male abuse is
unreported as men are usually ashamed of admitting that their female partner is
abusive. It’s not just phyiscal abuse we’re talking about either. It’s also
emotional, psychological, financial and isolation abuse.
I don’t blame men for not admiting to others that
their partner abuses them. Just look at all the ridicule that Jay-Z suffered on
9GAG. Remember that society paints a picture of how men and women are expected
to behave. Men are supposed to be strong and macho. Women are supposed to be
kind and nurturing. So when a dainty woman is fly kicking a big, muscular,
macho man, everyone’s cracking jokes and questioning his “manhood” . Flip the
scenario the other way around in which the man beats up the woman and suddenly
everyones crossing their arms and are thinking that he should have known
better.
Other than a few comments on the posting, I barely saw
any posts that condemn Solange for her actions. If anything, I encountered
justifications for her behaviour.
“Solange suspected Jay-Z of cheating”
“Jay-Z had made a move on Solange”
“Jay-Z had insulted Solange”
They almost exonerate her for her actions! All these
comments take away Solange’s responsibilty and role in the abuse and
continue to make Jay-Z the bad guy. Why does he have to be ashamed when he allegedly didn’t do anything? What
kind of message are we sending to society, especially males, when we ridicule
Jay-Z? We’re saying that if your woman, or any woman for that matter, abuses
you, it’s probably your fault and you should man up and take it.
Uhhh…..no.
What
needs to change is the idea that abuse is abuse, regardless of who is
delivering it and in what form. That’s the bottom line. It hurts and we won’t
stand by it. It’s up to us to accept that abuse can happen to anyone.
Rather than mocking someone for their experiences, be empathetic towards them.
Lend them an open, non-judgmental ear.
It might make all the difference in their life. Solve their 100th problem
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“From the Sidelines” is the section of the blog where I post links/ information about the pop culture references or resources I may have used in today’s post.
TMZ Video Footage of the infamous Solange vs. Jay-Z
Jay-Z's 99 Problems
Solange's Losing you
9GAG
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Pulling Teeth
Artist: Green Day
Album: Dookie (1994)
Let me know if you find any other songs that are remotely related to male abuse! I'm curious to see what's out there
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